I Met Grizzly Adams This Weekend.... Of Course I Did!

  

          Our big cross country move landed us in Colorado.  Most mornings I wake up and still can't believe I live in Colorado.  I get confused really easily too.  Like yesterday, I went to the grocery store and my lady/manager who bagged my groceries said, "Have a great afternoon and enjoy the game!"  I said, "Thanks!"  Then I walked away in my head saying, "Enjoy the game?  Enjoy the game?  What game?  Is Ohio State playing today?"  I was seriously so confused.  Then it dawned on me... the Denver Broncos were playing the Monday Night Football game.  The only reason I even conjured that up is because I remember Paul saying it in passing.

     Speaking of Paul, I do believe he is on a quest to explore every square mile of Colorado.  So, Saturday morning we drove to Denver for Jackson's soccer game and then we were on a mission to check on Breckenridge.

     We're all about free entertainment, which there seems to be a lot of in Colorado.  So, upon arriving in Breckenridge, we jumped on the free gondola.

     I'm not so found on this type of transportation.  Any time I think of thousands of pounds of equipment traveling along a piece of dental floss, I get a lot nervous.   My kids look happy and confident.  Gracie's new friend, Emily, who we brought with us for the day... looked like me.  'Deer in the headlights!  Why would we put ourselves on this ride INTENTIONALLY?' look.

           Looking longingly, wishing I was back in that parking lot. 

Had to take a picture of Emme holding Shelby's hand.  It was sweet and most of the time she can't stand Shelby (We can not figure out why.  Every time I ask Emme why she doesn't like Shelby, she says, "She always smiles and says 'HI Emme!"  Definitely a reason to hate someone, right?

 And, it just kept going and going.

And, though we would make it to a platform where one could get off, like this ski resort, guess what?  Either way you have to ride it back down.

Jackson was mad because I would't let him ride in a one by himself.  He should have been more mad at his dad.  While I agree that this mode of transportation must have rules, like only 8 people in cab.  There should be one rule that stands out above the rest:  NO FARTING!    Seriously, how mean is that?  There's no air, no way to escape.  It's just cruel and unusual punishment... for nothing!  We didn't do anything to deserve that sort of treatment.

They thought is was funny. 

Well... ha. Ha. Ha.

     Every time the car would go over the pulley system, I would accidentally let out a little scream.  Emme thought this was hilarious.  Jackson was still mad.

Gorgeous, huh?

     Breckenridge was having a Beerfest... er... I mean... an Oktoberfest this past weekend.  I thought it sounded really fun... until I got there.  People can drink A LOT of beer.  AND, did you know people dress up in German costumes for this event?   Yeah, well, I did not need to see the amount of cleavage and short skirts that I was seeing.  We quickly discovered that we enjoyed the unbeaten path WAY more than the beaten path.

 We had more fun playing in the stream.

I would be perfectly content to sit by that stream all day.

I think a lot of other people agree.

We were safe following that stream until we ran into the bungee trampoline.  We are all about free entertainment... this did not qualify.  But, I told Paul I feel like sometimes we torture the kids.  We make them come to these things and then all we do is say NO to everything.  So, we decided to let them jump.

And, I am so glad we did!  Their faces were priceless!  Jackson, once he got over the fear, managed to do a double backflip.

Gracie on the other hand... she tried and tried... just to do one flip.

On her last trip, she made it!!  YAY GRACIE!!

Sunday we decided we should explore more of Colorado.

So, Sunday, after church, we decided to go fishing.  We loaded up Jackson and Emme and 3 of our neighbors and drove an hour away to a beautiful area.

How cool is this tunnel through the mountains?   Also, please note, we are driving on a DIRT road.

Of course, I would not want to pick any area that was safe.  I've decide Colorado is not safe.  Hmm...

We picked our location and minus the person who was in the car you can see in the background, there was not another soul for miles.  And, that car was only there for a minute.

Jackson carrying all the gear.  Paul brought that bucket because he seriously thought we were going to catch a fish that big.

Jackson drinking out of his camelback.  If you don't know what that is, it's a little backpack that has a bladder (you can imagine how much I just hated writing that... sounds so gross.)  Anyway, it holds 50 oz of water.  There's tube that goes into the bladder.  You know, I'm not sure why they even bother with the word tube... why don't they just go ahead and call it a urethra.  Anyway, to all my Ohio midwest friends, this seems like a completely unnecessary thing to own.  However, now that we live at 6000 ft above sea level and find ourselves playing in mountains an additional 2,000-3,000 ft above sea level, it is necessary.  It is very easy to get altitude sickness and become dehydrated.  So, at a ski shop, we found them for half the price as the ones at Dick Sporting Goods, so we bought them.  Jackson has been dying for one.  You are now looking at the most hydrated boy in all of Colorado!  

You can see for yourself that there are no other people around.  Anyone you see in the picture, is with our group.  Paul was helping Jackson and I was intently helping the 3 other kids I brought with us.  I mean I was focused.  But, all of a sudden, I smelled something that didn't smell so great.  The smell greatly resembled taco meat or body odor... as I think they smell exactly the same.  It was an odd smell because just minutes before I was thinking how wonderful it smells in Colorado.  I was even trying to think of a way to describe it to all of you.  There's a hint of pine but it's mostly just a clean, sweet smell.  What I was smelling all of a sudden... not clean!

     I was trying to fix a fishing line and watch Emme when I heard this deep voice, "Mom, do you mind  if I get in and bathe?"  I was startled and jerked my head to the right only to find Grizzly Adams-Mountain Man, standing way too much in my personal space.  His face was very weathered... wind swept tan (yes, there is a difference between this kind of tan and a regular tan), dry, cracked.  I especially noticed the crack on the side of his nose.  He was in desperate need of some vaseline.   Anyway, I said, "No, I don't mind" because those were the only words I could find.  

      I mean this man seriously scared me to death.  I didn't hear or see him approaching.  Where in the world did he come from?

     Grizzly Adams took off his shirt and shoes and socks and started walking in the water.  

     Then I became a bit alarmed.  I started thinking, "There's miles and miles and miles of shallow stream JUST like this.  Was it REALLY NECESSARY for him to come right HERE?"

     Once he made it to the middle of the stream, he dove in and began swimming upstream... only he did not move one centimeter because the current was too strong.  Then he turned as if to sit on his bottom and  he starting scrubbing down his shorts... in the back and yep, in the front.  He proceed to use only his hands to also "wash" his face and his arms and his arm pits and on and on.

    Then he came walking back toward me.  He grabbed his towel and started a conversation, "All these kids yours?'  I said, "Only two of them?"  

     He looked at Emme, "Where's this one from."  

     

     I answered, "China."  

     "Yeah, I knew it was some place like that.  Her hair is beautiful.  My second wife always wanted that hair."

     So, I said, "Where is your second wife?  Chopped up in little pieces in that stream?

     (OK!!  So I didn't say that!  That's what my friend Gina said when I was telling her this story:-)  Funny, huh?

     At this point, Jackson had left Paul and had rejoined me so I said, "Hey Jackson, why don't you go get dad and see if he can fix this line?'  I just wanted ol' Grizzly Adams to know that I was not alone.

    At that point, Grizzly Adams moved down to the pile of rocks and walked down to the water.  Now, why didn't he just do that in the first place?  

     Geesh!  Seriously?!  Why do the weirdest things always happen to me?

     I'm sure you are wondering if we needed that big bucket.  The answer in NO... we did not catch a single thing.  But, it was one of the most beautiful places I have even been and I enjoyed every second of it.  I even went into the water TWICE to unhook fishing lines that were caught.  Who knew I was made for Colorado?

I Adopted the Queen... Apparently

     For those of you who don't know, I moved clear across the country.  Long story.  One of these days, I'll write about how we made the decision.
   
     However, in case you were worried that the crazy people would no longer find me (see previous post... if you can handle the bloody pictures of my achilles) your worrying must cease.  I have been found.

     We were here about 4 days when I decided I should make a real trip to the grocery store.  We can walk to the grocery store, so I would send someone over daily for supplies.  But, it was time, that I make a menu for the week and stop the madness.

     I took Emme and we drove the van.  I pulled into the parking lot and drove past a part of the outside of the store where a couple of tables and chairs await guests who... for whatever reason... want to sit in front of the grocery story.  I noticed one lady sitting alone at one of the tables.  She was sitting alone, but let me tell you, she was having a conversation with someone.  I mean she was talking away!  I thought she had an earpiece (bluetooth... why don't they call it a blue ear?  Seriously?).  I have assumed way too many people were crazy only to find out they were really on the phone... only they were not holding the phone.

     It was a passing thought.  I parked the van and waited for Emme.  Once she was out, I took her hand and began to walk toward the door and also toward the lady seated at the table.  At that point, the lady had her head in her hands and she looked as though she were crying.  That makes sense, right?  She sat at the table, had a difficult conversation on her blue ear and now, she just couldn't help herself, she was crying.

     That's what I thought until she looked up.  She looked right at me and very loudly she announced, "I'VE BEEN SEEING PEOPLE FROM NORTH CAROLINA ALL DAY!!"  I looked around to see who she must be talking to because, well, I not from North Carolina.  When I could spot nary another soul and noticed she was still starring straight at me, I looked down at my shirt which read:  Holden Beach, North Carolina.

    Darn!  Plan B:  ignore her, look away and whatever you do... keep walking.

     I did.  And, then she promptly began exclaiming again... as she moved from behind the table.  "SHE IS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL THING I HAVE EVER SEEN!"  She is now in front of us and has knelt down in front of Emme.

     "SHE IS JUST BEAUTIFUL!!!  OH!!  CAN I KISS HER??"

      And, before I could even process, she took Emme's face in her hands and kissed her cheek.

     "SHE IS THE PRINCESS!!!  I HAVE SEEN THE PRINCESS!!"  I GUESS PEOPLE FROM NORTH CAROLINA AREN'T SO BAD AFTER ALL."

     I had had enough of the North Carolina talk so I informed her that I wasn't from North Carolina.

     Her reply, "OH I KNOW!"

     I'm so confused.  How does she know?

     It didn't matter because her ranting began again and she took off her sunglasses and put them on Emme.  "HERE!!  I WANT YOU TO SEE THE WORLD THROUGH MY EYES! (She is still kneeling in front of Emme and yelling.)  I CAN GET UP AND WALK HOME NOW BECAUSE I HAVE SEEN THE QUEEN.  (She looks at me.)  SHE IS THE QUEEN!!" 

     I didn't think her talking could get any louder but as she walked away... it did.  "AND I DON'T CARE IF YOU ARE A DEMOCRAT OR A REPUBLICAN... JUST WALK IN LOVE!  I HAVE SEEN THE QUEEN!"

     She was walking away and pressing my luck I said to her, "Don't you want your sunglasses back?"

     "NO!  I NEED HER TO SEE THE WORLD THROUGH MY EYES!!  SHE CAN KEEP THEM!"

     What?!  What in the world just happened?  This is my first visit to the grocery that is right behind my house and this is what I am greeted with?  This is the place I must call home for who knows how long?

     We walked into the store and I looked down at Emme who was taking off her "new" sunglasses and she said, "I don't want these.  Throw them away."

    There you have it folks.  Proof!  Proof that no matter where I venture on this earth, strange things happen to me.  People find me.  Worry no longer that the stories will cease, they will not.

     Stay tuned.

Because I Never Want to Forget Part II

For those of you who love the gory pictures, here you go!

I think about the most fun thing you can do with a wound that looks like it could turn septic at any moment, an achilles tendon that was just repaired and a boot and a pair of crutches is head to the beach 12 hours away.

So that's just what we did.

My doctor changed my cast before I left because a) my cast was so tight it felt like my foot was having contractions and at any moment it was going to birth another foot and because b) we were headed to the beach. Although, it still doesn't make any sense because he told me to stay away from the sand and the water.

Oh good! So let's go!!!!!!!!

I had a long week at the beach. We went for a family reunion with Paul's side of the family. To get into any of the houses that we rented, I had to go up 2 flights of stairs. And, just to get to the beach so I could sit and sweat, I had to "walk" at least a football field.

After a long week, it took us 15 hours to get home and we got up the next morning and went to church. After church, we went to out to lunch because we didn't have any food in the house. When lunch was over, I sent Paul home with the kids and my mom out to pull up the car. She was going to take me to the grocery store, but I had to go to the bathroom first. The restaurant was not very crowded and I was so glad because when I have to GO.... I like to GO A L O N E!

I was hobbling back to the restroom and when I was just about at the door, this lady came up right behind me, "Oh, what you do to your foot?"

YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!!!! I have been living in a 1000 sq foot house at the beach with 17 people (yes, 17 people in one house) for a week. All I want it some privacy in the bathroom.

I make my way inside. "I dropped a knife and severed my achilles tendon."

I turned around to look at a woman and upon first glance and I got the vibe that she might be a little socially awkward. She had some really bad frosted hair that is spiked up all over the place, red lipstick and frosty blue eye shadow.

She responded, "Oh, did you have to have surgery."

I proceeded into the stall thinking surely she will not shut up, do her business and leave.

"Yes."

She headed into her stall and I heard, "So, who was your surgeon?"

"Dr. Walker." Keeping the answers brief. She'll get the point.

"Is he at the Valley?"

"No."

"Oh! He's not? Where is he?"

OH MY WORD!!!!!!!!!!!! I do NOT want to talk to you! I have business to do in here.

"He's at____________".

"I'm a nurse. I thought sure he was at the Valley."

"Nope."

"So, how long ago did you do it?"

For the love of all that is holy! Isn't there some kind of unwritten etiquette that you don't talk to people through stalls when you don't know them?

"4 weeks ago."

"When was your surgery?"

At this point, I realized I was going to get nothing accomplished in there so I came out. And, yep, she was right there waiting on me.

"I had surgery on the 30th, 10 days after the injury."

I started drying my hands.

"When can you walk on it again?"

I walked to the door. Opened the door. Went out the door. Turned around. Held door open for myself and answered her ANNOYING question.

"Well, my brother is a foot and ankle surgeon and he says usually 8 weeks after surgery."

WRONG thing to say.

"Oh, where is he a surgeon?"

"Pittsburgh."

"Oh, so are you a nurse?"

At this point I have moved farther away and now she is holding the door open.

"No. I'm not a nurse."

"Oh, I'm surprised you're not a nurse."

NOW WHY ON EARTH ARE YOU SURPRISED I AM NOT A NURSE????

BECAUSE MY BROTHER IS A DOCTOR AND I HAVE AN INJURY???!!!

"So, what to you do?"

"I attend anger management classes so I don't shoot annoying people!!! NOW LEAVE ME ALONE."

Ok so I didn't say that. I think I muttered something about being a teacher and then I turned and NEVER looked back. I told her my mom was waiting.

She went back into the restroom. Probably to finish the business she wouldn't let me do!!

Geesh!!

The next day, Janae asked if I could meet her after she taught her Zumba class. She too had been on vacation and we wanted to catch up. We decided to head to a little restaurant that I had never been to. It had an outdoor seating area and we thought it would be nice to sit outside and talk.

We had probably been there about 20 minutes when the door opened and headed out to sit at the table right next to us was..... yep, the lady from the day before.

I gasped and Janae turned and said, "What?!"

I said, "That lady! She was at the same restaurant I was at yesterday."

Janae, being facetious says, "I don't know how you'd recognize her."

No one could forget that hair.

I lowered my voice and I said, "I've got to tell you about her."

I leaned in closer so I could whisper and Janae could hear me.

The lady and her husband/boyfriend ? were seated RIGHT next to us.

As the frosty spiky haired lady was being seated, she looked at the back of Janae's Zumba shirt and she started talking, "So, you teach Zuhmba?

My eyes got really wide and I looked straight into Janae's eyes and I said, "She just asked you if you teach Zuhmba? ZUHMBA!"

We fought the urge to die laughing, instead we ignored her and I kept talking.

Again we heard, "So, you teach Zuhmba?"

Again we ignored her.

Why is she saying it like that?

I honestly don't know how we kept it together. We are not the most mature people together. We think the same things are funny and we laugh... A LOT!

We kept looking at each other and kept right on talking. She was not saying A WORD to her boyfriend/husband (same guy she was with the day before, by the way) and she kept glancing at our table.

I whispered, "Janae, she keeps looking over her for any break in our conversation to talk to us."

Janae: "Just don't look at her."

We had managed to avoid her for a long time. But at about 10 pm and we decided we both needed to head home.

We stood up and she saw her chance. "So, you teach Zuhmba?

Janae: "Yes, I do."

"Yeah, I've been to your Zumba class. (She said Zumba. She can say it right! Why was she saying Zuhmba then?) (And, WHY DID SHE KEEP ASKING IF SHE ALREADY KNEW THE ANSWER?) Yeah, but you move so damn fast I can't keep up with you! I'm going to come again. You still teach on Wednesday? Yeah, I'll be there Wednesday. Where do you think I should stand? I've stood in the back and I can't really see that well. I don't want to be in the front though."

Janae came up with a brilliant idea, "Well, I guess you could stand in the middle?"

"Yeah. I'll be there Wednesday."

She shifted her focus to me. "What happened to your foot?"

Seriously?!

"I dropped a knife and severed my achilles tendon."

"Oh, d'ya have surgery."

IS THIS A JOKE?

"Yes."

"Who was your surgeon?"

"Dr. Walker."

"Oh, is he at the Valley?"

Ok! Where's the camera? There is no way this lady does not remember this same story from a little more than 24 hours ago.

"No."

"Are you a nurse?"

WHY DO YOU KEEP ASKING ME IF I'M A NURSE?

"No. I'm not a nurse."

Janae started walking away and I followed right behind her. We got through the door to the inside of the restaurant, waited for the door to close safely behind us and burst into tears of laughter.

What are the chances? What is wrong with people and how on earth do they find me?

I went to Zumba on that Wednesday.

Oh yes I did! I sat right there next to the Janae's stage and prayed to the good Lord that the frosted spiky haired lady would show up. I could just visualize her doing some Zuhmba.

You can imagine my disappointed.

And, this story my friends, is what I really want to remember about my injury.

Socially awkward people! I love them!!!

Because I Never Want to Forget Part 1

It's been a year since I've written a blog post. That's ridiculous. It's probably ridiculous given any context but it's even more ridiculous given that I have spent at least 14 weeks of this past year doing very little. As a matter of fact, 8 of those weeks I wasn't even allowed to put any weight on my left foot.

Why? Well, glad you asked.

On June 20th, I was making dinner for my family and for Janae's family as they were returning from a trip. I didn't have a kitchen sink because we were remodeling our kitchen. So, I carried a skillet with some utensils down the stairs and into the laundry room. I have a large utility sink so I was washing everything in there. As I stepped into the laundry room, my foot gave out and I couldn't walk. I thought I stepped on something and that the pain would register in a moment, so I turned to try to walk again to see what I stepped on. Again, I could not walk. Instead, I noticed a gaping hole right above my heel (it split like chicken) and some blood on the floor. Then, as my eyes glanced up, I saw a large slicer knife with a pronged end lying on the ground.

Our friend Leah was at our house doing laundry, so I very calmly yelled at her, "Hey Leah, can you come down and help me." She came down to find me on all fours as I could not for the life of me figure out what to do. I then asked her to get my phone. I called Paul and told him what had happened and asked him what I should do. At this point, I was white as a ghost, face covered in sweat beads, and positive I was going to blow chunks at any moment.

He said, "Go to the emergency room." I said, "You don't understand. I'm really hurt. I can't walk. " He said, "I know! Go to the emergency room!" Clearly, not thinking straight, I was like, "Oh the emergency room!"

I got off the phone and realized I was no better off than when I called him. I still could not walk. Leah and Shelby got me a towel and some tape and I taped the towel around my foot, and then I started to crawl. I crawled over to the stairs and then up the stairs. I crawled around the corner to the front door and then realized I had no idea what to do. By this time, Gracie and our neighbor was home so they ran to get me some crutches. They brought the crutches back and I was in no condition to adjust them as they were way too big. Finally, I held onto Leah and Shelby, hopped what seemed like a mile to the car, and then Leah drove to me the emergency room.

I waited way too long in that waiting room. I was not hurting I just wanted that gaping hole closed up. I saw a teenage boy holding a towel around his finger, I desperately wanted to bet him that my cut was worse than his, but I never made it over there.

While I was waiting to be taken back, my friend Courtney called. Her husband, Brad, out of the blue, insisted she call me. When she found out where I was, she came straight to the hospital.

I was taken back for xrays while my male nurse friend made sure he told me I was his greatest nightmare. He was sure I was in some slasher film and someone had waited under my car to slash my achilles or I was walking down an old wooden staircase where someone was hiding, whipped out a knife and slashed my achilles.

Comforting. Clearly, he had taken a few courses in counseling patients.

While it was confirmed that my achilles tendon was indeed slashed in two, the story was no where near as exciting as he was trying to make it.

My mom and Paul arrived at the hospital sure I had over exaggerated my cut. At this point, they had me turn over on my stomach so they could flush the wound.

Janae was calling and being called for updates on her drive home. Finally they stitched me up and told me I needed to contact a surgeon for the repair.

Janae arrived at the hospital right before I was released and Courtney went to teach her Zumba class while she stayed with me.

Meanwhile, my friend Jen had gone to get my kids at home, taken them to dinner and then hung out with them until we got home.

Once at home my friend Andrea (please pronounce AHHn drea) arrived and before I knew it, there was a party at my house. And, while it was definitely not an occasion to celebrate, it sure made me thankful to be surrounded by so many people who cared.

While I never want to forget what it feels like to be surround by so many friends and family, this is not really the purpose for this post, so, you're going to have to come back tomorrow to read what I REALLY never want to forget:-)

I'm rusty. You didn't think I was really going to get it all done in one post, did you?

My first cast... all for a cut.

Getting my first cast cut off before surgery.

The cast the surgeon put on. Written on my leg

Yes.

Shew! They got they right leg

More pictures tomorrow!