Monday, September 10, 2012

I Adopted the Queen... Apparently

     For those of you who don't know, I moved clear across the country.  Long story.  One of these days, I'll write about how we made the decision.
     However, in case you were worried that the crazy people would no longer find me (see previous post... if you can handle the bloody pictures of my achilles) your worrying must cease.  I have been found.

     We were here about 4 days when I decided I should make a real trip to the grocery store.  We can walk to the grocery store, so I would send someone over daily for supplies.  But, it was time, that I make a menu for the week and stop the madness.

     I took Emme and we drove the van.  I pulled into the parking lot and drove past a part of the outside of the store where a couple of tables and chairs await guests who... for whatever reason... want to sit in front of the grocery story.  I noticed one lady sitting alone at one of the tables.  She was sitting alone, but let me tell you, she was having a conversation with someone.  I mean she was talking away!  I thought she had an earpiece (bluetooth... why don't they call it a blue ear?  Seriously?).  I have assumed way too many people were crazy only to find out they were really on the phone... only they were not holding the phone.

     It was a passing thought.  I parked the van and waited for Emme.  Once she was out, I took her hand and began to walk toward the door and also toward the lady seated at the table.  At that point, the lady had her head in her hands and she looked as though she were crying.  That makes sense, right?  She sat at the table, had a difficult conversation on her blue ear and now, she just couldn't help herself, she was crying.

     That's what I thought until she looked up.  She looked right at me and very loudly she announced, "I'VE BEEN SEEING PEOPLE FROM NORTH CAROLINA ALL DAY!!"  I looked around to see who she must be talking to because, well, I not from North Carolina.  When I could spot nary another soul and noticed she was still starring straight at me, I looked down at my shirt which read:  Holden Beach, North Carolina.

    Darn!  Plan B:  ignore her, look away and whatever you do... keep walking.

     I did.  And, then she promptly began exclaiming again... as she moved from behind the table.  "SHE IS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL THING I HAVE EVER SEEN!"  She is now in front of us and has knelt down in front of Emme.


      And, before I could even process, she took Emme's face in her hands and kissed her cheek.


     I had had enough of the North Carolina talk so I informed her that I wasn't from North Carolina.

     Her reply, "OH I KNOW!"

     I'm so confused.  How does she know?

     It didn't matter because her ranting began again and she took off her sunglasses and put them on Emme.  "HERE!!  I WANT YOU TO SEE THE WORLD THROUGH MY EYES! (She is still kneeling in front of Emme and yelling.)  I CAN GET UP AND WALK HOME NOW BECAUSE I HAVE SEEN THE QUEEN.  (She looks at me.)  SHE IS THE QUEEN!!" 

     I didn't think her talking could get any louder but as she walked away... it did.  "AND I DON'T CARE IF YOU ARE A DEMOCRAT OR A REPUBLICAN... JUST WALK IN LOVE!  I HAVE SEEN THE QUEEN!"

     She was walking away and pressing my luck I said to her, "Don't you want your sunglasses back?"


     What?!  What in the world just happened?  This is my first visit to the grocery that is right behind my house and this is what I am greeted with?  This is the place I must call home for who knows how long?

     We walked into the store and I looked down at Emme who was taking off her "new" sunglasses and she said, "I don't want these.  Throw them away."

    There you have it folks.  Proof!  Proof that no matter where I venture on this earth, strange things happen to me.  People find me.  Worry no longer that the stories will cease, they will not.

     Stay tuned.


The Gang's Momma! said...

OMIGOSH! You have no idea how tickled I was to see your blog title pop up in my Reader first thing this a.m. I have missed your funny view of the world :)

We are headlong into the wait for another sweetie and just last week, I was thinking about how we never got our meet up in GZ. So where did you move to? AND wow! Your kids are sooooo grown up. It's been too long since I peeked in on ya'll.

Yay, April's back! April's back! Yay! :)

Jenney said...

I need to go back to the Blogluxe website and see if they're doing that nomination thing again. Cause if you're gonna blog and be funny I'm gonna nominate you. Welcome back. (And goodbye I guess since you lived nearish to me!)

Jenney said...

Wow. You need to win. Cause that's a party!