I'm a Sucker!

Here's my friend, Janae, at the Zumbathon we went to.

Yeah, it was for Halloween. People were supposed to dress up.

(I know she's not going to be too happy about the picture, but she owes me from this past Monday. Please... read on!)

In case you don't remember, I took up Zumba. I very much have a love/hate relationship with this latin- inspired dance-fitness... workout... exercise... madness... whatever. I love that I am soaking wet when I leave. BUT, I hate, hate, hate some of the moves!! Some of them, I just refuse to do. I'm so weird! Plus, my hips... they just don't move like that.

Anyway, that's really neither here nor there. I don't want to talk about the ways in which my body will or will not move. Let's just say....it's not pretty. What I do want to do is talk about is how my friend, Janae, has turned an exercise class into a ministry.

She teaches this amazing exercise class. I knew the first time I took the class she was amazing... the best. It was confirmed at that Zumbathon we went to. Hands down... she's the best. Anyway, she always has some worship music somewhere in her selection of songs for the evening. And, when the hour long sweatfest is over, any one who wants can stay and hear someone give a talk about God's word.

Do you remember this summer when Janae was really sick? (She's doing great by the way! BUT, you can still pray that her heart makes a full-recovery, that she gets a definitive diagnosis, that the right treatment plan is prescribed, that she wouldn't need to keep taking steriods and that the doctor's would continue to be amazed by her recovery and God would receive all the glory! Yay God!)

ANYWAY...

When she was so sick, I felt sorry for her. I hardly knew her but something possessed me to go up to her and volunteer to do the devotion. It didn't seem fair for someone so sick to try to teach an exercise class for a ministry.... and then also prepare and deliver a devotion. Even though I hardly knew her, I sensed her sadness on one occasion when she couldn't hold that part of the class.

I HATE SPEAKING IN FRONT OF PEOPLE!! But, if you walk with God, you KNOW when he tells you to do something. He's taught me so much and I knew I could stand up ONE TIME and talk about Him and His amazing Word.

Soooo... that was way back in July when I did what I thought would be the first and only one. Apparently, God or Janae or both have other plans for me. And since I am kind of a sucker for both, I thought I'd share with you the second one I did last Monday. (Nov 4). I won't even tell you that this past Monday morning at 8 am I received an email from Janae asking me if I could have another prepared by 6 pm THAT NIGHT. (Um... this would be #3 ... if your counting. I thought I'd agreed to one??) All of a sudden she thinks I am Beth Moore or Joyce Meyer.

Please!

I'm going to have to come up with a speaking fee.

Well, here was the second one:

How to Fight.... God's Way

I always feel an urgency to share with people what I am going to share tonight. So, if you are close to me, I apologize for you having to hear this again. It’s a lesson I learned the hard way and I hope someone else might learn from my mistakes. I also always feel an urgency to share this because in all my years “in church”, I was never really taught how to fight my way through things that had a strong hold on me.

Since I was 19 years old, I have been fighting a battle. That’s half my life. It has not been a physical fight, although, sometimes I wonder if that wouldn’t be easier. Instead, this battle has taken place on the battlefield that is my mind.

Way back in 1990, our family experienced a string of tra and deaths, which for me resulted in anxiety attacks. The attacks acted themselves out with physical symptoms such as a racing heart. This is turn made me so nervous I couldn’t relax. I’d often feel like I was going to have a heart attack or like I was losing my mind. This panic disorder lead eventually to depression and a vicious cycle of one playing off of the other began. Medicine greatly helped but even with the medication, I felt like it was always lurking around the corner trying to rear it’s ugly head. I have never been completely disabled by it, but it has no doubt played a major role in the way I functioned from time to time.

I know that without my relationship with Jesus I would not be standing here today. There would have been no reason to fight through such an awful war. God has been so faithful even when I thought for sure he had fallen off the throne. For the last 19 years and especially the last 6 years, I have been educated in the power of God and His Word through this field trip of my own failure, weakness and bondage.

So, I am going to try to sum up in 5 points what has taken me almost 2 decades to learn.

Think About it and Power Verses:
1. It’s important to understand that we are all in battle. Ephesians 6:12 says, “ For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.” This battle is not one we can see but that doesn’t make it any less real. In fact, not seeing it, makes it even worse.

2. In the battles we fight, Satan’s main line of offense comes by setting up strongholds. A stronghold is anything that exalts itself in our minds, “pretending” to be bigger or more powerful than our God. It steals much of our focus and causes us to feel overpowered. Controlled. Mastered. Whether the stronghold is an addiction, unforgiveness toward a person who has hurt us, or despair over a loss, it is something that consumes so much of our emotional and mental energy that abundant life is strangled- our callings remain largely unfulfilled and our believing lives are virtually ineffective. Exactly what Satan wants.
3. We are instructed to fight these battles and we have only been given two weapons. One is a sword, Ephesians 6:17 “.........the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.” Then the next verse, verse 18 says, “And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests.” Our two weapons are prayer and the Word of God.

4. We have to use our weapons. . The most common way today that a modern “fortress” is demolished is by strategically placing dynamite in the building and then detonating it. Imagine the demolition crew showing up at the building with sticks and stones. They could holler at that building with all their might and throw sticks and stones until they fainted from exhaustion and it would still be standing. No one would doubt they had tried, They simply had the wrong tools. What they needed was dynamite. You and I are about as effective as the crew with loud mouths, sticks and stones when we try to break down our strongholds with carnal weapons like pure determination, secular psychology, and denial. A stronghold has to be demolished. God has handed us two sticks of dynamite: prayer and The Word. What is more powerful than two sticks of dynamite placed in separate locations? Two strapped together. We need to take our two sticks of dynamite- prayer and the Word- strap them together and ignite them with faith in what God says he can do. In other words, I believe we have to find scripture about whatever we are dealing with and pray that scripture over our lives.
5. I think the scripture needs to be confessed out loud. The enemy can’t read our thoughts. Besides, Jesus fought Satan in the wilderness by quoting scripture when he was being tempted. What makes us think we can silently pray a quick prayer in our minds and defeat the enemy. Here are some verses that I believe reinforces speaking aloud. Rev 2:16. “...I will soon come to you and will fight against them with the sword of my mouth.” Hebrews 4:12, “For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword...” Psalm 103:20, “Bless (affectionately, gratefully praise) the Lord, you His angels, you mighty ones who do His commandments, hearkening to the voice of His word.”

Apply it:
Speak God’s word over your problem areas. Scripture should be applied like medication. If we are bleeding, we don’t run and take an aspirin. We apply pressure and bandage the wound. Scripture is to be used the same way. I use two books that lists scripture for things like anger, anxiety, control, forgiveness, insecurity, power, prayer, trust, wisdom and worship. These two books are the very things God has used in setting me free... albeit one link at a time.
Praying God’s Word by Beth Moore
The Secret Power of Speaking God’s Word by Joyce Meyer


You can’t defeat Goliath with your mouth shut. I Samuel 17:42-48 tells us that when David was preparing to do battle with the giant Goliath, he ran toward him confessing out loud what he believed the end result of the battle would be.

Then said David to the Philistine, You come to me with a sword, a spear, and a javelin, but I come to you in the name of the Lord of hosts, the God of the ranks of Israel, Whom you have defied. This day the Lord will deliver you into my hand, and I will smite you and cut off your head. And I will give the corpses of the army of the Philistines this day to the birds of the air and the wild beasts of the earth, that all the earth may know that there is a God in Israel.

David’s example shows us how we should approach the enemies we face in our own lives. We must open our mouth and speak the word of God.

God, I pray for each person who reads this blog. I pray that you would show each them how powerful, alive and active your word is. I ask that you teach us how to use your word to fight whatever Goliath we are facing in our own lives. Thank you for giving us your word- because only your word has the power to transform lives. May this week bring some kind of transformation for every person because we have applied your word.

Thank you Lord! In the life-changing power of your name, AMEN!!

Last nerve

Things that get on my ever-lovin' LAST nerve:

IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER:

1. Fruit flies- They apparently have nothing else to do but breed BECAUSE I can NOT get rid of them. And, lest you forget, I am the Queen of Google so... yep, I've tried it!

2. Cleaning out containers of old food in the frig- I'd rather have a barbed-wire enema. It's so disgusting! Don't tell, but someone brought a dip to my house on Oct 9.... and I just cleaned the container out today. And, the part that makes no sense is, the longer it sets in the frig... the worse it smells. I have smelled that nasty dip all day!

3. Dust pans- The crumbs... they never all make it in. I go through all the trouble and get my vacuum cleaner out just so I don't have to use a dust pan. Or, I sweep it in the corner and wait for Paul.

4. People who talk to me when I am trying to write..."SILENCE! I kill you!"

5. Trying to drink a smoothie and ice gets stuck in the straw. I have had a protein smoothie every day for the last... who knows how many days. I put in skim milk, banana, strawberries, raspberries, blueberries and spinach. Paul swears I puree all my food these days.

6. People who call me one their way from point A to point B.... but only do it to kill time. If you've got something to say... that's fine... but don't call just because you've got nothing else to do.

7. Paul picking off his fingernails and leaving them... well... Let's just put it this way. Right before we left the college we had worked at for 4 years, I decided to have someone clean our couch. The couch has been up against the same wall for 3 years. When the lady went to move the couch to clean behind it, the wall was lined with a pile of fingernails Paul had picked off his fingers and dropped behind the couch. I was mortified.

8. Feeding Emme. It's such a chore. She doesn't want to eat and I have to fight her off the liquids the whole time.

9. People who get mad because you don't call... but they don't call you either

10. When I can't see someone talking on their cell phone because it's CONNECTED to their ear... and they are standing by me in a store and I am the only one around SO I am SURE they are talking to me or they are cracking up

11. When you can't get off the phone with someone. And, about 21 times, they act like they are going to let you get off... "Well listen, I gotta go... did I tell you about Bertha's cousin?"

12. Socks -where do they go? For real?

13. When people try to talk to me before I've had coffee in the morning.

14. ANY repetitive noise. Makes me want to run through a glass window.

Sadly, there are more. I just can't think of them right now. What gets on your last nerve??

TrIcK oR TrEaT.... yum!

I haven't been trick or treating with a friend in a long time. Paul and I just usually take the kids out by ourselves. But, this year, Paul was out of town FOR THE THIRD WEEKEND in October! What?! (I'm not bitter.) (I just leaving next weekend and going to Chicago to visit my friend, Gina and meet her new baby, Lucy.) (And, then.... I may or I may not come back?)

So, the kids and I went over to my friend, Janae's to trick or treat. They grilled out some hamburgers and hotdogs. We got the kids dressed up. Janae's husband, Michael, and I walked around with the kids begging for candy. Then we went back, the kids ate who knows how much candy... while we adults sat out by a bonfire and talked. It was so fun!! Here are some pics:

Michael thought Emme should have gone as a Chinese take out container... so he gave her one. VERY soon we are going to have to stop the silly jokes because she's going to start understanding... but, until then...
Michael, eating the contents of the box. I think he was going to try to stuff Emme in it, but her forgot.
Emme and her best buddy. I hate that this picture is blurry. Why, oh why, do I have so many camera issues? At least I remembered my camera, batteries and the camera card. Nothing short of a miracle.
Emme LOVED wearing her costume. I have had to put it back on her several times this week.

Janae making her youngest into Sharpay from High School Musical.
Jackson.... Clearly, the mask wasn't working out so well for him. I feel like in every picture he is holding his head at an odd angle.
A skeleton, a 50's girl, a doctor and a bee... interesting combination.

Throw in a jockey and Sharpay!

This is my favorite picture. Michael in the background trying to get Janae's grandpa to come to the door.

Some lady saw Emme in the road waiting in the wagon... so she comes running out of her house, "Is that a baby??? I've got stuff for a baby!!" She gave her Goldfish, Teddy Grams, Applesauce and peaches. That should do Emme for... a good week. Emme was very content sitting all smug in her wagon.

This guy in the orange barrel cracked me up. I want that costume!

Soo... it was a great night BUT because it's my story... there always has to be some drama. I mean .. what would one of my stories be like without the weird drama?

I pulled in the driveway. The kids were tired and cranky. I'm tired from being a single mom... blah, blah, blah! I push the button to get the garage door up, it goes up about 6 inches and comes back down. I did it about 261 more times because... well, you just never know what the magic number might be. About that time, it occurred to me that I didn't have a key to my own house. I called my neighbor. We had given them a key to hold for us in the past, but we needed it once and never gave it back. Surprise!

Our neighbor came over anyway with a bag of keys and low and behold, one worked!! THe Hallelujah chorus started playing in the background! 20 minutes after pulling in the driveway, we were in the house.

We found out yesterday that our garage door needs a new $200 coil. It's a good thing my Father (in heaven) owns the cattle on a thousand hills cause he's gonna have to sell a few and give out of his glorious riches to his kids down here. We're not setting the financial world on fire right now!

Which one is Chinese?

Seriously, why does Shelby look more Chinese than my Chinese daughter?

See all those leaves? For who knows what reason, Jackson had my keys Sunday. Between Sunday night and Monday afternoon, I spent 8 hours looking for them. Finally, my neighbor came over and started raking the leaves looking for them. After, mind you, I had torn my house apart trying to find them. She found them.

I guess I should just be thankful, huh?

Nobody better EVER ask me what I do all day!!

Huh?

Isn't that the scariest picture I put at the very top of my blog? I hate that picture. It's so creepy. I know it's our friend's little boy... but, HELLO!... he looks like he's going to come kill me.

Paul can't hear. He's 38. What's it going to be like when he's 70?

When I say he can't hear, I am not exaggerating either. He recently failed a hearing test. If he can't read my lips, he can't understand me. For real. He is forever asking me to repeat myself.

Although, I'm not going to lie, sometimes, it's so funny!!

Tonight, Casper was on tv. Every time Emme looked at the television, she would whimper. Paul said, "Emme's not a fan of Casper."

I was working on my project for school. Oh! Excuse me... I meant to say I was working on Gracie's project for school. I had my head down because I was writing. (These school projects... seriously.... I better get a report card.) I responded and said, "Emme's not a fan of the Halloween aisle."

But because Paul couldn't read my lips he said, "Huh? She doesn't like the paranormal?"

Hahahahaha! I died laughing! When I could finally respond, I said, "She doesn't like the HALLOWEEN AISLE but I suppose she's not a fan of the paranormal either."

For Gracie's project, we had to take a picture of her demonstrating one of the metaphors used in the Bible to help us see Jesus more clearly. We chose John 10:11:

"I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep."

Jesus and Casper in the same post. Only me.

Normal... only a setting on a dryer

*****Blog background change... for Michael Corbett who complained because he couldn't read the blog on the last background.*******

********The picture was from Trick or Treat 2008. The year we ventured to the dark side. It was an innocent dark side. Shelby was a rocker girl and Gracie was a spider Fairy.... and Jackson... he had a REALLY bad haircut:-)!!!************

Here's a glance at last week!

And the interesting people I live with.

Before reading, remember... normal is only a setting on a dryer.

This is Shelby's first year attending school. I would be lying if I said I wasn't at all worried about how she would assimilate. I think she's doing great. She seems really happy. She has a lot of friends. Her grades are great.

But, last week, I questioned all of that. She had a book report due on Monday. On Sunday night, she asked if she could read it to me.

She ran upstairs, changed clothes and came back wearing one of her dad's suit jackets and a hat. She began reading her report as if it were written by the professor in the book. I wish you could have heard her read. The accent... unsure of it's origins but very good nonetheless. At one point, the professor's hot air ballon, in the story, was attacked by a see.... bird. See... bird. Seabird. (Can you guess where that's from?) Anyway, she squawked just like a seagull. I was on the couch laughing (dying) the whole time. She didn't care.

And, yep, she marched into her class on Monday morning and read it exactly the same way to her classmates and her teacher. (I asked.)

When she came home, I asked her if anyone else went to all the trouble. She said, "One boy put on some jeans." (They wear uniforms at her school.) I so wish I had her confidence. She so belongs on the stage. I have known since she was little that once there, she'd never come off. I have enjoyed her all to myself for the last 11 years. I guess it's time to share.

Next.... the child that cried for an entire month about having to go to school. Never mind that he is the only child that has been to school since he was three. I am still a bit perplexed by it. I can't tell you how we got him to stop crying because then you'd have to call children's services on us...... KIDDING!
I went on a field trip with him. When I arrived for the field trip, he looked like he'd lost his best friend. When I asked him what was wrong, he said, "I am afraid I am going to cry when you leave." I had to drive separate from the bus, so I told him he better find his smile on the bus or I wouldn't chaperone another field trip.

He found it!
Jackson and his bren. (That's how he used to say friend. Every once in awhile, we all still say it that way.)
EVERY DAY I have to write his bus # on his hand. EVERY DAY! Never mind that EVERY where we go, he sees the number and tells me, "Look mom! There's my bus number!" It's on his backpack, it's on his lunch bag. Wow! He has been an interesting bird this year. See....bird.

Emme having a REALLY bad hair day eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. She's making progress with eating. I've actually been praying about it more and so have the women in my Bible study. So, like my pastor Charlie always says, "When I pray, coincidences happen. When I don't pray, coincidences don't happen."
A rainbow on Friday night. I took that as a promise from the good Lord that I could in fact make it through the weekend with 3 kids playing in a soccer tournament with no husband to help. And, here I am... writing about it. Barely. But, I am here.
Shelby played on Saturday morning in the frigid cold. I mean frigid. Emme was shaking by the time it was over. Saturday, her game went into overtime. She and another girl scored in over time, so they won. On Sunday, they played for 1st place. They lost 5-0. The picture above is her receiving her 2nd place trophy.

Jackson also played in the frigid cold on Saturday. We had to be there at 7:30 am. It was dark. God wasn't even there. They won the first game so they played again at 1. Gracie also played at 1:15. Grr! I tried to go back and forth but.... Jackson scored a goal for his team in the first quarter. In the last quarter, the other team scored. Overtime. 5 minute overtime.... no one scored. Another 5 minute overtime... with no goalies. No one scored. They went to 3 vs. 3... no subs. Jackson was in that 3. No one scored. Switch the 3 vs. 3 kids..... our guy was going to the goal DEFINITELY going to score. All of a sudden, a player from the opposing team pulled his arm back to he wouldn't score. The ref made nary a call on it. It was insane! Thankfully, the same kid dribbled back down again... and scored! Yea! But, poor Gracie didn't have anyone watching her. They only won 1 game the entire season. I wasn't really expecting much, but did feel sad for her. I felt like my mother because all weekend I kept saying, "I AM ONLY ONE PERSON! I CAN ONLY BE IN ONE PLACE AT ONE TIME!"

Sunday Jackson played for 1st and won 5-0. YEA!!!!

I know I have been on a blogging hiatus. Sorry! This sending your kid to school thing... it's taken a toll on me:-) I'm worn out!

Things that make you go...hmmmmm

I'm not gonna lie to you... Peppermint Patty make me go.... hmmmm

1. Only in America......can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

2. Only in America......are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

3. Only in America......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the
store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

4. Only in America......do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

5. Only in America......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

6. Only in America......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and
put our useless junk in the garage.

7. Only in America......do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting
so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

8. Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

9. Only in America......do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well:
'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.

10. Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.



EVER WONDER ~~~~

Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?

Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on "Start"?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid is made with
real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make
the whole plane out of that stuff?

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

~~~~~

Here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.

On a Korean knife: Keep out of children.

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.

On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary.
Details inside. (the shoplifter special?)

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how??...)

On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's
"just" a suggestion.)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down."
(well..., a bit late, huh!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought????...)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't
this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after
taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction
accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and... I'm taking this
because???....)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there,
help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

On a Swedish chainsaw:"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands."
(...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)