Thursday, November 27, 2008

Happy Thanksgiving!! I am done blogging!

     I don't think I realized the craziness of my life until I started blogging.  I'm kinda naive that way.  So, I decided I should quit blogging and then I could just go back to being naive.  But, then I thought about it some more.  I really like writing so I'm just going to have to embrace the crazy.  At least I have something to write about.

     This week, I had had enough of Emme's spitting up,  gagging when I simply brought out her food, coughing and crying while eating.  We were up Saturday and Sunday from about 12-2 am, while she screamed and screamed and screamed, and of course, threw up.  So, Tuesday, we went to the doctor.  

     We were there for 2 hours.  She had 8 vaccinations ( 6 shots).  The doctor was very concerned about her weight and said she CAN NOT get sick.  I totally agreed.  One of the reasons I threw up the white flag was because, according to our scale, she had lost weight.  She had in fact gained 7 ounces since our last visit to the doctor three weeks ago, but the doctor said she should be gaining an ounce a day.  Emme also had her urine tested.  The nurse taped a bag to her peepee and we waited and waited and waited.  Of course she was not about to drink formula or Pedialyte or water.  Heaven forbid we speed the process along.  The doctor also scheduled an Upper GI for Monday morning and a gastro doc visit for Tuesday.  Sounds fun!

     I was also instructed to give Emme PediaSure or Whole milk and Carnation instant breakfast.  I told her I thought she had a milk allergy, but she was hesitant to agree.  So, I went out and bought Emme PediaSure.  (That was Tuesday night.)

     Paul and I were not asleep long when Emme woke up.  He went to give her a bottle.  He was back in 5 minutes  and they both were covered in old pink PediaSure.  On Wednesday, while I was trying to cook for the 26 people scheduled to come to my house for Thanksgiving,  Emme threw up 6 more times.  After the 8th throw up and the 5th bath, it dawned on me, "I bet the PediaSure has milk in it and darn it!  I knew she had a milk allergy."  GOLLY!!  How dumb!!  I paged the doctor but a nurse called me back.  She said, "If she throws up 3 more times, you need to take her to the Emergency Room."

     Well, after her extremely intelligent mother put her back on soy formula.  She was fine!

     Now, fast forward to Thanksgiving Day.  Our dinner was scheduled for 2 pm.  Our family of 6 minus Emme ran around like mad getting ready.  Paul left around 12:00 to run to the University to pick up 5 Chinese students.  (Why 12 and not 1:55??  I asked the same question.  I wanted to kill him!) I'm not going to lie.  I was stressed about them coming.  I so desperately want to open my home for people, and we usually try to do that.  But, I am spent.   

     And, how am I supposed to talk to my family, all 21 of them, and talk to Chinese students I have never met??  AHHH!!!!!  (The Chinese students are here for a year.  The don't know many people.  They don't leave their apartments except for class.  The campus is a ghost town.  I was in China for 2 weeks and felt I couldn't go out much without a guide.  I can't imagine how they feel.)

     When the Chinese students came in, after I met them, I asked them if they were scared of our food.  They said they were.  I said, "That's ok because I was scared of your food too."

    I'm just saying!

     So, trying to be the gracious host, I made things I don't normally make:  steamed rice, plain broccoli, plain corn and plain green beans. 

     When it was finally time to eat, Paul called everyone together.  He gave a very brief Thanksgiving history from a Biblical perspective.  Jackson prayed.   Then, we quickly tried to explain to the students the food on the table.

     We let the students go first.  After they filled their plates and sat down, my aunt pulled me aside.  She whispered, " I don't think that Chinese boy understands the mashed potatoes.  He took a roll, opened it up and put a whole bunch in the middle."

     I guess he liked it that way because I looked over a little later and he had another roll filled with mashed potatoes and cranberry sauce on top of all of it.  Hey, to each his own!

     It was pretty uneventful dinner.  I thought the students wouldn't eat much.  Boy, was I wrong.  They ate and ate.  I think they all went back three times.  And, they hardly touched the rice.  I think my dad, however, was trying to get in touch with his Asian roots.  He ate a huge vat of rice with broccoli and gravy.

     I have stopped trying to understand people.

     Being the host, I was last to sit down to eat.  As soon as I sat down to eat, I took Emme from my mom.  I gave her a teeny speck of sweet potatoes.  She liked them, so I gave her another little bite.  She gagged.  And, yep... she unloaded all over me!  I was covered, COVERED!!   I had to change my clothes.

   Do you know why she threw up?  Because, apparently, my mom missed the memo about Emme and milk.  Never mind that I called her 20 times yesterday to tell her about Emme puking.  While I was running around like a chicken with my head cut off, before our guests arrived,  my mom yells at me, "Emme loves the fruit in this pie with the milk!  She's eatin 5 huge bites!!"

     With all the craziness, I wouldn't change a thing.  It's my life.  I am blessed.  And, I am very thankful!!!!!!!

     Hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving!

     Stayed tuned for pictures tomorrow.  I have to sleep now!

Sunday, November 23, 2008

All I want for Christmas....

     I never ask for anything for Christmas.  I usually just pick up something I want when I am out and about and call it my Christmas gift.  It saves a lot of time.  No returns that way.

     This year, I thought I'd throw a wrench in all of that and ask for a gift.  So, we were in the car the car the other day and I said to Paul, "I think I want a Christmas gift this year."  He was all ears... because I never ask for anything.  

     "Well, actually, I want one of two things.  I either want electrolysis for my eyebrows..."

     He about went off the road.

     "What?" I asked him. " Have you seen the rate at which my eyebrows grow??  One of these days the dogcatcher is going to come after me!"   

     Seriously, it's ridiculous!  And, the worst part of it is, I always forget to keep up with them until I start having double eyebrows.  You know, the regular eyebrow is still there and then the new growth under the regular one starts to take over.  You know it's bad when the non-observant daughter says, "What's wrong with your eyebrows?"

     So, I think it's a perfectly legitimate request.  Who has time to take care of four kids, homeschool them, pay the bills, grocery shop, make all the meals, clean up bodily fluids, wash clothes, shuttle kids to all their activities, do post-adoption paperwork, schedule a multidisciplinary approach to all Emme's issues, etc....  Did I mention that there will be here 27 people at my house for Thanksgiving????  6 of them students from China attending the local University !!  (What in the world am I supposed to talk to them about?  And, do they even eat turkey?  Speaking from experience, I want nothing to do with their food.  What makes me think they want some sweet potatoes and cranberry sauce??  Should be interesting!  It's gotta make for a good story... at least.)

    "Ok, well I either want electrolysis for Christmas or a photography class.''

     I gotta raised eyebrow and a smirk of the mouth from that request.  Translated... "now that's a good idea".  

     I think, if you ask for something totally ridiculous first, the next request is bound to be granted.

     I have always loved to take pictures.  I have been the only historian in my family and Paul's family.  My brother, awhile back, bought me a really nice, very expensive camera and I am sure I am not making full use of it

     You'll see what I mean when you see the pictures.  I need help!  

     I didn't get any natural picture taking abilities either.  If their is some kind of picture taking gene, we don't have it in our family.  I don't know that I have ever seen my dad with a camera in his hand.  And, my mom, bless her heart, (you can say anything you want about someone if you say 'bless their heart' first) apparently, she has some kind of disability that does not allow her to look through a camera's view finder,  focus on a face and then capture the face in the square. Lots of pictures of me when I was growing up.... I only have half on a head.  Or, my brother and I would be in a picture together and since I was a bit older and taller, there would only be a picture of my body - no head!  (More on that to come in a future post.)

     So, because I want to be like Pioneer Woman or my friend Sharla, when I grow up.  I need a few lessons.  But, until I get those lessons, if you want me to share some things with you,  you're just gonna have to deal with the poor quality of my photos.

     I meant to share this first recipe awhile back so you could try it and then decide if it would be something you'd want to make for Thanksgiving, but clearly, that did not happen so you're going to have to trust me.  

     The first recipe is for a pumpkin cake.  It is important to know that I hate pumpkin pie.  I wish I felt about all desserts the way I feel about pumpkin pie.  I'd have a lot less problems. 

     Last year, the girls and I studied our way around the world, starting in the USA.  At the conclusion of the tour, it is suggested to make some of the recipes that were listed in one of the books we were using.  So, had this recipe not been in that book, I would have never tried it. Why??  Because I just told you I HATE pumpkin!!!  Are you not listening?

     But, even though most of the recipe comes from the book, I would like some credit for tweaking it and making it my own and making it better.
     We'll start with the ingredients: 1 box yellow cake mix, 2/3 cup o' sugar, 4 eggs, 1/2 cup vegetable oil, 1 teaspoon cinnamon, 1/2 teaspoon nutmeg, 1/4 teaspoon ground cloves, 1 can of pumpkin (16oz) and 1/4 cup water.
Look at that awful picture!!  One would think I'd be embarrassed to even show it!  

Anyway, combine all of the dry ingredients in a large mixing bowl.
     I always stir the dry ingredients around.  

    I also thought I'd take a picture of my hand.  Do you know that my hand has looked about 90 years old since I was 16??  What is up with that??  But, besides looking at my 90 year old hand, I wanted you to see my nails.  I did them myself in about 5 minutes from a $3 box of fake nails I bought from CVS.  I think I missed my calling!

    Add eggs and stir them into the mixture.

    Add the water and the oil.  
    Check out my mixer.  He's handicapped.  Poor fellow. (He's got one leg.... please read like the skit from Saturday night live.  I've got one leg) He's busier than a one-legged man in a butt kicking contest.  If he can do it, anybody can!
    How on earth do you lose one of your beaters??  One of these days, when my rich uncle dies, I am either going to get a second beater or a kitchen-aid mixer.  (P.S.  I don't have a rich uncle.)

     He looks worn out, doesn't he?
     Add the pumpkin.  Beat on low speed until smooth.

     Poor into a greased pan.  Bake at 350 for about 35 minutes.  The ol' toothpick methods works if you want to check to see if it's done.

     The recipe in the book calls for baking it in a bundt pan for an hour.  I don't like the word bundt so I used a regular cake pan.  

     The recipe did not call for icing either so I made my own.

    Take an 8 ounce package of cream cheese and 1/4 cup of butter- allow them to soften!!  Very important.
     Look at that hideous picture.  As if you can tell what's in there!
     Anyway, it is very important that you use your mixer to blend the cream cheese and the butter FIRST!!
     Then, add 2 teaspoons of vanilla and blend that together.  After that is blended, add a 1 pound package of powdered sugar.  If you try to add the powered sugar before you blend the butter and the cream cheese.... your icing will look like it has some sort of disease.  It will be all bumpy and not look pretty at all!
     Once the cake comes out, allow it to cool.  I usually put mine in the refrigerator.  And, if I am really impatient, I put it in the freezer.  

     After it cools, you can ice it!
     ****NOTE****   Put the cake back in the refrigerator and allow it to get really cold.  It tastes best this way.  It's actually a great cake to make a day ahead.

     If you try it, let me know how you liked it!

     Because I have no shame about my picture taking ability, now I will show you a true invention of my own.  I was looking for a way to get more fruits and vegetables into my system and especially into my kids.  So, I made this up and they all love it.  As a matter of fact, they ask for one about every day.
     Ingredients:  banana, frozen strawberries, a frozen berry blend (includes blueberries, raspberries and blackberries) fresh spinach (which I accidently froze one time and it still worked perfectly... so now I always freeze my fresh spinach.
There's the awful picture.  Hey, you gotta start somewhere!     Then, (and I am so sorry that I don't have measurements, I just wing it according to how many people want one) I add some Northlands Cranberry Pomegranate (it is 100% natural juice, no sugar added.)  Next, I add some skim milk.  I also use 1 or 2 packets (again depends on size) of stevia.  (Stevia is a natural sweetner.  There is nothing artificial in it!  I love it!!  You can find it with the sugar or in the health food section of a regular grocery store.)  I top it off with crushed ice and blend until there are no chunks.  You can make it thicker if you use less liquid... that's the way we like it.  Then we eat it with a spoon.

     That blurry purple thing is the final product.  And, just so you know, you can't taste the spinach AT ALL!!  It is so yummy!

    Let me know if you try this too!  

Saturday, November 22, 2008



    Recently, oh... alright... 5 seconds ago, I was pilfering through the kids Halloween candy and I came across several small packs of Whoppers.

    Paul says, "Why do they even sell Whoppers?  No one like them.  No one!!  I have never met one person who likes Whoppers!!"

    Always feeling the need to defend the underdog, I replied....

     "If no one liked Whoppers, they wouldn't make them.  There are people who like Whoppers!"

     "Do you like Whoppers?"

    "Well... I don't really like them. But, they are chocolate for crying out load.  I'd eat them in a pinch.  If I was pms-ing or dying for chocolate and if they were lying around, I'd eat 'em."

    "That's how everyone feels about Whoppers!"

     "No!  There are people who like them and crave them and specifically go out looking for Whoppers."

    "I  have never met one person who likes Whoppers!"

   "Well, you haven't met everyone in the world!"

    There!  Take that!

     So, I am looking for ONE... one person who likes Whoppers!  Anyone, anyone?  Bueller?  Bueller?

Thursday, November 20, 2008


Enough of the bodily fluids already!!  Geesh!

Yesterday, while driving in the car, Emme kept gagging.  Every time she would gag, the kids would laugh, or say something to her.

So, I said to them, "If she gets a reaction like that from you every time she does that, she's going to keep doing it." 


Miracles still do happen..... they stopped.

So, as we are pulling into the YMCA to take Gracie to gymnastics, I hear, "OH GROSS!!"

Then, "That's disgusting!"

"Mom!!!  Emme is throwing up everywhere!!"

So, I pull up in front of the Y and tell Shelby to walk Gracie into her class.  I, then, get out to survey the damage. 

 Oh, the damage!

Since Emme still has to sit backward (probably until she is 10... GAIN SOME WEIGHT ALREADY or at least take some of mine!), her lunch is all over the back of theseat.  She looked like she was wearing a scarf as it covered her neck and continued down under the coat.  I didn't even know where to start.

So, I straightened out her coat.  I kid you not.... there was a puddle sitting in the middle of her coast.  A very large puddle of very stinky milk.

I should tell you that before Paul and I got married we signed a prenuptial agreement.  It stated:  IF PAUL IS WITHIN A 30 MILE RADIUS, HE IS THE PUKE CLEANER UPPER.

Well, he was within said radius but there was no time to wait for him because Jackson had to get to tennis!  AHHH!!!!!!

So, using my pincher fingers I grab material and start ripping clothing off.  Thankfully, I had an outfit with me.  But, she had tights on and they were still clean... so we just put on the purple shirt with the black tights.  Doesn't sound bad but looked hideous!

At this point, it has been an eternity and Shelby is still not back.

So, I give the command to Jackson, "Jackson, run as fast as you can and find Shelby."

Jackson loves feeling like the man, so with his chest puffed out and the ever so cool look on his face, he runs into the Y.  Stopping of course to hit the handicap button because.... I HAVE TIME TO WAIT FOR THE DOOR TO SLOOOWWWLLLY OPEN!!

Comes back not 30 seconds later huffing and puffing like he just ran a marathon, (please, gasp for breath as you read) "I couldn't find her anywhere!"

Why!!  Why does that not surprise me??  Paul couldn't find the mustard in the refrigerator if it reached out and smacked him right across the face!  And, it seems his son is following in his footsteps.

So, now what??  Jackson needs to get to tennis.  Emme is crying because vomit is caking around her neck. She looks retarded in her purple shirt with black tights.  I don't know where Shelby is... what to do!!

Maybe Shelby just thinks she is supposed to stay with Gracie.  But, what if I leave and she comes outside looking for me??  And then, what if a stranger drives by right at that very second and kidnaps her??  What if someone grabbed both girls in the Y and took them out another door?

  These are all, of course, very logical rational thoughts.   

What if Shelby is in the bathroom tossing her cookies and she needs her mommy???

I breath a heavy sign, pull into the closest parking space, get little orphan Emme out of the car, with no coat, in 30 degree weather... and run like the wind (Bullseye) into the Y.

We sprint down the hall, past the pool.  Fly around the corner leading to the next hall.  Run down that hall.  About knock down a 90 year old man coming out of the workout room...all the while Emme's head is bouncing around like a bobble head doll.  We are a site I tell you!

I arrive at the entrance to the gym.  I instantly see Shelby.  She is sitting in the gym like a very responsible adult, working on school work and eating her orange slices.

I look at her like she's an idiot and yell, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!"

Poor thing is mortified.  "I thought I was staying here."

"Ok, fine!!  Stay!!  Your dad will be here soon!"

Me, Jackson and Emme run the same course back to the car.  We hop in the car and fly to the tennis center.

As were are pulling in the tennis center, I realize why I wanted Shelby.  Who's going to walk Jackson in???

I can't take Emme out of her seat again.  It ticks her off to get in and out and in and out.  And, sometimes when she gets really upset.... she vomits!  Big surprise!

So, I pull up and do the unthinkable.  I lock the doors and run Jackson to the entrance to watch him go in.  The door shuts behind me.  I am gone for maybe 45 seconds.

When I come out, I fully expect a police officer to be waiting for me.  And, about that same time...... I am thinking jail sounds pretty good!:-)

WHY, oh why did I curse myself and name my blog dirty laundry???

p.s.  Since escaping the jail sentence yesterday, Emme deposited her dinner all over me.  She was so tired because she didn't get her 2nd nap (spoiled brat!) (must be nice to have someone make you lay down for naps!) yesterday.  So, when she gets all worked up.....

This morning I have had to wipe a hiney TWICE because the man child has diarrhea.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

It Figures!

     First of all, yea!  I have a new blog!!  I was so sick of Miles and Miles to Mylei... especially since I didn't even get the child I named Mylei.

     Next, this is not the look of my new blog.  I like this but I am having mine custom made.  Oh yeah, I am trying to run with the big dogs!  It might be a couple of weeks until the new look is revealed.  And, part of that is my fault!  

     BECAUSE, finally, I have a new blog name after months and months of desperately trying to think of one.  Should it really take that long??  

     I also think I jinxed myself.  See, I think about laundry and do laundry ALL THE TIME!! There is not a day that goes by that I don't do laundry.  But, isn't it ironic that the same day I plan to reveal my new blog, one of my girls decides to get a stomach virus.  She's been up since 5:45 am blowing chunks.  I think she's working on bile now!

     So, you guessed it!  Stomach virus=more laundry.... EVERY SINGLE TIME!  And, we all know that it's just a matter of time until it works it's way around the rest of the family.

    We are supposed to have pictures taken this week by my friend, Lori.  I plan on using these pictures in my new blog.  But, I am pretty sure it's not a good idea to take pictures when two of your children are green.  and one is throwing up!

      So I am off... to do some laundry.... one load at a time!!:-)

P.S.  Can you pretty please leave me a comment to let me know you made your way here???