Monday, January 19, 2009

Intelligent conversations and behaviors

     It's amazing that I can handle intelligent conversations with adults. Or maybe I can't. Now, that I think about it, maybe other adults don't think my conversations are intelligent. Hmmm....

     Well, I don't really care. I have too many other things to think/worry about.... like, 

     Are the bumps on Emme Chicken Pox?

     So, for now, I am going to pretend that I do in fact, have intelligent conversations with other adults.  And, it's a wonder because the conversations I have with these children of mine.....

     For instance, last week, Jackson missed his bus. I was just zipping his backpack up and that forsaken bus driver drove away. In all fairness, I usually have the door open BEFORE she gets to our house. And, I did open the door AS she was driving past AND he had not ridden the bus to school the last few days, but still..... frustration!! Emme was asleep, and I had no choice but to drive him to school.

     So, I gave the girls the run-down, made the house as secure as Fort Knox (another good story I'll share tomorrow) and headed out the door with Jackson. On my way out I said,

     "Shelby, you guys go ahead and eat lunch so when I get back we can get started on your schoolwork again."

     To which she replied,

     "Mom, I don't want to eat when an adult's not here. What if someone chokes? I don't know the heimlich manuver."

     I just stared at her. Are you kidding me?

     So, I think I said something like, "You're just having Beefaroni!! If you choke on that, you deserve to die!'

     Ok, Ok, I didn't really say that! I just said, "Shelby!" and walked out the door!


     Then, when I got home (and, yes, they had already eaten) Gracie was singing some Christmas song. I looked at her and said in a sad tone "Oh, I know! Don't you hate it when Christmas is over?"

     She said, "Yeah, (long pause) the problem with Christmas though is, all I think about is the presents. I don't think about Jesus one bit."

     So glad that my all my hard work, teaching them at home, day after day after day after day after day is paying off. I can see the spiritual maturity.... NOT!

     For the next conversation, I'll need to explain the layout of my house a bit.

     Our kitchen is open to the floor below. So, to get to the kitchen, any normal person would walk up the stairs. Not Jackson! Almost every time he wants to get to the kitchen, he runs over to a chair, grabs the railing that separates our kitchen from the living room, hurls his body up the wall and over the railing. I was so frustrated with his climbing one day, I said to Paul, "You have got to make him quit climbing up my cabinets and walking on the countertops!!!"

     Paul said, "April, I honestly don't even think he knows he is climbing all the time!"

     When Paul says things like that, I really want to punch him. He always defends Jackson and his boyish behaviors. BUT, if I say something like, "I CAN NOT quit eating that cake, it is so good!!"

     He will say to me, "Yes you can! You can stop! You don't have to eat it!"

     So, I can always help my behaviors but Jackson can not..... whatever!

     It pains me to say this, but in Paul's defense, one day Jackson was on the countertop and he was pulling himself up onto the refrigerator. I yelled, "Jackson, what are you doing!!!."

     He stopped, midway into the ascent, looked at me very puzzled and said (this was before his speech therapy), "I don't eban (even) know."

     He promptly got down and walked away.

     All that to say, he's still climbing. Periodically, he will get up on the counter and look on top of the refrigerator as if I have some secret stash up there. Almost every time he's up there, he sees a pack of matches and holds them up and says, "Look mom!"

     And, every time I say, "Yeah buddy, don't ever play with those, you could burn the house down."

     So, the other day, when he was looking for whatever in the heck he looks for on that refrigerator, he grabbed the matches, held them up and with a pleading look in his eyes he said, "Mom, here, you need to take these!"

     It was as if the temptation to strike one of those matches had gotten the best of him.

     I feel I should pause for a minute and say something really spiritual... like.... that's what we should all do with temptation in our life. We should stop when we are about to do something wrong and tell someone about it and let them help. We should flee like Joseph did when Potifer's wife was tempting him....

     Ahhh, there! I said it.

     Sometimes, when I think about my blog, I think I should show some depth and talk more about my relationship with Jesus. After all, He is the most important thing in my life. But, every time I sit down to write, I just vomit all this other stuff out. It just comes and I can't stop it. (Paul would say that I can stop it!) (Sometimes, I don't like Paul very much.)

     Just so you know though, I am applying my own advice. I am fleeing from something that I have let get the best of me. I have a good friend keeping me accountable in an area right now, I will talk more about it in approximately 33 days.

     One more thing because THIS IS THE LONGEST POST KNOWN TO MAN!!!

     Earlier I had mentioned Emme having red bumps on her legs. She also had a few on her finger, some on her arm, a couple on her ear and one on her foot. I think these red bumps appeared last Monday. Yep, one week ago. I thought they were a mild version of the chicken pox. It was an educated guess. The internet pictures looked the same as the ones on her body.
She had recently had a vaccination against the Chicken Pox. A mild outbreak a couple weeks later seemed very reasonable to me.

     However, when she woke up on Saturday, the one on the top of the left foot was VERY red and swollen AND when I touched it.... she about went through the roof!! Since, I NEVER let things go, like cavities (click) go, I decided to see if we could get her into the doctor.

     FYI, if you call and say something like, "My daughter has red bumps all over her", the receptionist will work you in.

     The doctor took one look at her leg and foot and said, "Hmmm, I think it might be strep! Let me look at her throat. Yep, very red! Let's look at her ears! Oh, the left one doesn't look so good. I am going to swab her throat. We should have the results in about 15 minutes."

     About 5 minutes later, the door opens, the doc walks in and says, "It came back VERY quickly positive for strep. The nurse is going to come in and give her a shot in each leg. They are going to hurt really bad! She'll be in in a minute."


     The nurse came, violently jabbed her legs with those wretched needles and walked away. For the next 15 minutes, Emme let me know how bad those shots hurt. She screamed herself to sleep.

     I drove away and was struck by a terrifying thought, "Emme has strep!!!! I let her stick her fingers in my mouth all the time!! OH NO!!!"

     Why does she like to stick her fingers in my mouth??? I don't know. Maybe it's because I actually have teeth... unlike her!  Who knows???

     Later that night, the swallowing began to hurt and sure enough, yellow stuff started growing on the back of my throat.

     Intelligent conversations.... intelligent behaviors like letting little people stick their fingers in my mouth... this about sums up my life right now!! But, I wouldn't have it any other way!:-)

     When I downloaded my pictures a bit ago, I had no idea that someone had caught Jackson in the action of climbing into the kitchen!

     There you have it folks!  Strep on the feet and legs!


Sharla said...

As usual I'm cracking up... I love the way you take the everyday moments that we all experience and find the humor in them (that's why I gave you the lemonade stand'll have to stop by my blog to pick it up! But you'll have to go back an entry because I've outed us on our challenge...I just didn't tell them it was you!)

Hope you're feeling better... Poor little Emme's legs look painful...


Anonymous said...

I enjoy reading your Blog... I have never posted a comment before.. but wanted to let you know how much I enjoy reading about your everyday life... you make it sound so exciting and funny... even though it might not be funny at the time... :)
Congratulations on your step forward to loose what you feel you need to...
Cheering you on...
Angie H.

TCKK said...

Your post is so funny, but I'm so sorry the little one is sick. Those bumps look so painful! And now you're getting it too. I hope you both recover very quickly. The stories about Jackson climbing and the matches crack me up. Thanks for making me laugh.

Gina said...

Do you have strep seriously? Are you ever NOT going to be sick??

Look at Emme's foot!! Poor little thing. And that story about Gracie and Christmas. I've been laughing about that all day. Oooh! And Shelby and the heimlich. sp?? that was so funny!

Now you have to write another funny post to top this one. Good luck! =)

Jenney said...

I am so so sorry Emme (and you) have strep, that is misreable. I have to admit I got kinda excited that she might have chicken pox because I thought maybe she could expose my son to them. Isn't that terrible? I am a terrible mom. If you get a lemonade stand award, I need to win a lemonhead award.

Anonymous said...

Sickness is the pits! Poor Emme... can't get over anything without getting something else.

When I read about the matches I chuckled to myself because last week I had to call AAA to jump the car. While in the driveway with AAA I told the kids to get their coats & shoes on... long story short, I came in to get them out to the car and smelled burnt something. Walked towards Charlie's room and found him behind his bed... Uhhh... "Well, I just burnt a piece of paper mom... look." "Yeah, we don't play with those...' Boy's are way different and I agree... I don't think they know they're jumping, climbing, bouncing, dribbling, etc...

Jodi said...

OK, those shots of her leg (no pun intended) looked awful! "THANK GOD FOR ANTIBIOTICS!" Bless her sweet heart - and mom's too. Strep can be sooooo hard on adults, so take good care of yourself for once. Mom's aren't ever really allowed any sick days - at least I am not! Hope you both are felling better soon. You are still funny as all get out and cheer me up! Thanks!

Jenney said...

My husband loves OSU (poor him) and he sent this to me. I thought of Paul yelling "OH" in the elevator in China and knew I had to forward it on to you. Enjoy