Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Playing with the Minds of Quirky People

A little over a year ago, I read a book by Francis Chan called Crazy Love.  

Did I like the book?  I think so.  Although, it moved me way outside of my comfort zone.  I can't remember specifics right now.  I just know I was really convicted about my love for God and people.

Something really cool about the book though was the author asking readers to visit this link:  

Now go visit it.  

I can't imagine not believing in God after watching this little 3 minute video.

I also can't believe the conversation I had with Paul when we discussed the video.

Before I tell you about the conversation, I just want to revisit a comment I made about myself in the previous post.  I'm quirky.  I'll be the very first person to admit it.  Part of my quirkiness involves some odd thoughts I have.  I shared one with Paul the other day.  It was a thought I had about 15 years ago.

15 years ago, I was engaged to another guy (not Paul) (I need to share that story sometime, huh?) (I called it off 3 weeks before.) and the relationship was sending me over the edge.  I was living in a state of panic/anxiety/depression.  While I was headed over to do something with this other guy I was engaged to, I was analyzing my thoughts.  But, I really didn't want to think anymore.  It occurred to me at that moment that I can never get away from myself.  

I shared this intimate moment of my life with my husband and he looked at me like I suddenly had a horn sprouting from my head.  He said, "I wish I had known this a long time ago."  

It was as if sharing this with him would have altered the course of his life with me.  He just can't let it go either.  He brings it up to me all the time.

Does anyone understand this thought but me?

I just meant... I can't get away from my thoughts.  I can't ever stop myself from thinking.  Ok, so I also told him that that thought made me panic, but we've been married 13 years and 8 months now.  And, I am pretty sure he knew I wasn't normal when we were dating.

Really, all this is beside the point now because, he said something to me recently that may have made me 2nd guess my decision to spend the rest of my life with him... so I think we are even.

 But, that's irrelevant right now.  The point is... I am quirky.  I don't like thinking of the abnormal.  I don't like thinking about end times even thought I know we win.  I don't like imagining eternity in Heaven because... well, that's weird.  Eternity?  That word stresses me out.

He knows all these things!

So, having that knowledge of me, why upon discussing the video that you were supposed to go watch... why would you say, "I think there is other life outside of earth."

"What do you mean?  Like life on other planets?"

"Well, like there are so many galaxies out there that we don't even know about.  I bet there are other solar systems with other earths and those earths are full of people."


"Yeah.  God loves people.  Why would we think he'd just make one planet full of us?"

Now do you see what I mean?  Would you share that with someone who is disturbed enough to admit that it makes her panic to know that she can't get away from herself?  I can't get away from people in general and now I have to think about other solar systems floating around out in space with other earths full of other people?

And, then I just have all these questions that no one can answer because no one knows!  Does the earths look the same?  Are the continents and land masses the same?  Are the ethnicities of people the same?  What about the geography?   Do they deal with the exact same issues?  Did someone get in a boat one day and discover the American on that earth?

See what I mean?  The list goes on and on and on.  Why?  Why would you share that with someone you know is quirky.  I can't get past things like the People of Walmart website?  Why people go out in public the way they do.  Now I have to imagine that there are other earths full of the same people.

Do other earths have Walmart?  See, it never ends.


Sweet Floweret said...

You know I understand exactly what you mean. Maybe some other people will understand too! That thought stresses me out too, the thought of all there is that is unknown to us. But I'm learning to be able to trust that God does know and it will all be okay...even though I can't figure it all out. That's not my job.

But you sure are quirky. Paul shouldn't really talk though because he's seriously quirky too. So....

Jenney said...

Wow. People of Walmart site. You should never have mentioned it. I spent 20 minutes I don't have looking at it. Wow. Those people all live in Xenia, I am pretty sure. Want to take your own pictures and put them on that site? Visit Xenia. I'm pretty sure if there are other earths out there...there are not 2 Xenias.